Crazy costumes, thrown sweets, interactive scenes and comedy cross-dressing. What more could you possibly wish for? Pantomime, at least in the UK, is as big a part of the Christmas tradition as turkey, tinsel and leaving out a tumbler of something potent for Santa. For the past decade the Phnom Penh Players have been bringing this seasonal English spectacle to Cambodia’s capital. This year’s incarnation, The Epic Pantomime, features Greek gods, an overconfident hero and at least one very questionable accent. The Advisor cornered a few of the show’s stars to talk flying shoes, fourth walls and how to properly pronounce the word ‘hag’.
Why don’t you start by introducing yourselves?
Hades: I am Hades, the God of Chaos and Strife.
Athena: Pallas Athena, Goddess of Wisdom and Heroes.
Kendall: Zak Kendall, Pantomania’s greatest historian.
Le Rogue: I…
Just a minute. Zak, you mentioned Pantomania. What can you tell us about the place?
Kendall: I thought you would never ask. The United Kingdoms of Pantomania are a group of kingdoms that share borders. Previously I have helped to detail the histories of several of Pantomania’s other kingdoms, but this is the first year that we have visited the coastal kingdom of Greece. I have a map if you would care to look.
A lot of areas on this map seem to be covered in question marks…
Kendall: Look, I’m a historian, writing about a pretend country. The UN isn’t exactly bending over backwards to fund my work. It’s a one-step-at-a-time thing. Research is necessary; I can’t just jump around mapping everything. Some of these kingdoms don’t even have air-con, and don’t even get me started on A’Labia – you can’t even get a drink there!
I’m sorry. I’m sure your work is a lot harder than we could ever imagine.
Kendall: It is actually quite easy, but thanks for the sentiment.
Le Rogue: AHEM!
Oh, of course! Sorry I interrupted you before. Could you please introduce yourself to our readers?
Le Rogue: Le Row.
The Roo?
Le Rogue: No, no, no. LE ROW!
Kendall: Pay no attention to him. He’s just a sidekick.
Le Rogue: Oh, le no! ‘Sidekick’ is such a demeaning term. I prefer ‘the hero of less authority’.
Noted. What’s with the chains?
Le Rogue: Just a small misunderstanding involving a local magistrate’s wife.
And you, your Excellency?
Perseus: Prince Perseus, the most decorated general of Greece.
Yes, I couldn’t help but notice your medals. If my eyes don’t deceive me, that round one there is actually for tying shoelaces.
Perseus: Thank you for noticing, citizen. I’m afraid they are not as polished as they could be. It’s so difficult to find good help in the kingdom these days.
Well, now that we’ve all met, I’m interested in this ‘fourth wall’ you mention. Can one of you explain?
Kendall: The fourth wall is what one imagines in their head when they are standing on the stage. It is an invisible barrier between the audience and the people on stage. In a pantomime it is traditional for the characters to actually address the audience; it is an artistic tool that is paramount, but not necessarily exclusive to a pantomime.
Hades: Oh, please. Someone shut him up! Three months of rehearsals and he just continues to get on my nerves. He is worse than Joe, Kate and Abigail combined.
Time for a change of topic, methinks. How about the title? ‘Epic’ is a term people seem to throw around a lot lately. What exactly is it that makes your pantomime so epic?
Le Rogue: Well…
Hades: She’s not talking to you, fool!
Kendall: By definition, an epic involves a hero on a cyclical journey or quest. The hero faces temptations and adversaries and returns home significantly transformed by his journey. Generally the hero learns or discovers something about himself that he didn’t realise before. An epic hero illustrates traits, performs deeds, and exemplifies certain morals that are valued by society.
Hades: Blah, blah, blah! Listen to him! The guy sells one bloody story and suddenly he’s some sort of literati.
Kendall: Some of the greatest examples would be Gilgamesh, the Odyssey, or Beowulf… but I can see by your blank expression that you have no idea what I’m talking about. Very well, it’s a little bit like the original Star Wars trilogy, although I promise you there are minimal Star Wars references.
Got it. So it’s a hero’s journey?
Kendall: Is English your first language?
And the hero in this case would be you, correct?
Perseus: Oh, I’m sorry. Were you talking to me? What publication are you with again? Time? Rolling Stone? Heroes Monthly?
[Sigh] The Advisor.
Perseus: Oh, The Advisor. Of course. That Jehovah’s Witness magazine. I’m sorry, but I don’t give interviews to people who just randomly show up and knock on the palace door.
Athena: That’s The Watchtower. You’ll have to forgive him. He has a tendency to be a little self-centred. It’s something we’re working on.
If we’re working off the Star Wars model, then I would assume there’s some sort of mentor/Obiwan Kenobi type figure?
Athena: That would be me. It’s my job to help mould Perseus into the kind of hero that the kingdom of Greece needs. A true hero does not simply go around sticking his sword into any old thing. A true hero must recognise the needs of others and must put the betterment of his fellow man before himself. You may have noticed that currently Perseus is a little lacking in the humility department and that he overcompensates in the vanity department.
Perseus: Oooooh, are we talking about me again?
Hades: Just keep combing your hair, prince.
Athena: As the Goddess of Heroes, my mandate is to set Perseus along the correct path. I am the first of four gods to endow him with the tools and wisdom he needs to succeed.
Kendall: When she says ‘tools’, she means magic weapons.
Four gods? Is that a reference to the four ghosts in Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol?
Kendall: Well, well, well. Apparently you are not as stupid as you look.
[COUGH!] You mentioned magic weapons. Like what?
Athena: There is a magic shield, a magic sword, two pairs of flying shoes and, of course…
Le Rogue: Flying shoes? Hah!
Kendall: Says the guy who cried like a baby when he fell three feet from a suspension wire.
Le Rogue: Three feet? Le no! It was at least one metre – and my shoulder is still sore.
Kendall: Three feet IS a…
Le Rogue: Please, monsieur. Your ancient system of measurement gives me a headache.
OK, enough about the shoes. What of the other weapons?
Athena: There is the sword of songs and a shield of visibility.
Visibility?
Athena: Yes, it is the second most powerful item of visibility in the Kingdom of Pantomania.
A shield of visibility? Second most powerful item? I’m afraid that comment can’t go without further comment.
Athena: It…
Hades: Mind your words!
Kendall: I concur. Those thieves at 20th Century Fox already tried to cash in by stealing our title with Epic 3D and my lawyers have advised us not to comment.
OK, let’s move on. Again. You mentioned adversaries. Who? [Silence] Don’t everyone jump in at once…
Le Rogue: Oh, can I speak? [Looks around table, hesitantly] Well, there is a temptress, three blind witches, a dragon of the sea…
A dragon of the sea?
Le Rogue: Le oui, a dragon that lives in l’eau salée. Parlez-vous anglais?
Nous pourrions parler en français si vous préférez.
Le Rogue: I have no idea what you just said to me, but dragon, yes. And the three witches. I know nothing of their magic, but three single women gathered in the same location always make me a bit nervous.
Athena: You can see why he’s the sidekick.
Le Rogue: Excuse moi?
Athena: Forgive me. I meant ‘the hero of less authority’.
‘Temptress.’ Now she sounds interesting.
Le Rogue: I do not wish to speak of this. It was a very traumatic experience for moi. Even more traumatic than the time I spent in prison, before I was repatriated to Pantomania. By the way if your audience would like to read some of my beat poetry about my time in prison they can visit my website www.rightfullyconvicted.com. I also frequently perform anywhere that appreciates a criminal and do so in a singlet so that everyone can see my amazing collection of tattoos.
So would you say this temptress is the main antagonist in the show?
Le Rogue: Pardon moi. An-ta-go-nist? I am sorry, I do not speak Latin.
Kendall: He means ‘the villain’.
Le Rogue: Oh, of course – and oh, le no! The temptress is not the biggest challenge. That would be the ’ag known as Medusa.
Kendall: He means ‘hag’.
Le Rogue: This is what I said, no? ’ag.
An ’ag? What exactly is that?
Kendall: Like a witch, but super upgrade.
So this super upgrade witch, Medusa, would be the villain then?
Hades: Shades no! Are you blind? Do you think I’m sitting here in these dark robes because I’m a member of the chorus? I am the villain! I intend to spin the Kingdom of Greece into a downward spiral and plunge all of Pantomania into chaos!
Athena: And how has that been working out for you so far?Hades: Admittedly it has not been going very well in rehearsals, but the weather changes every day. Mortals crave chaos; the people of Greece, the people of all of Pantomania do not know how to live in peace. They want violence, they want tyranny. They are all fairytale characters, after all.
Fairytales do have a tendency to end happily, however.
Hades: Are you unaware of the law of averages? At some point the tables are bound to turn!
Athena: Keep telling yourself that.
Hades: And you keep hedging your bets on that little prince and we will see who wins in the end.
As much as all this bickering puts me in the Christmas spirit, I’m afraid we need to wrap this up. In closing, is there anything left you’d like to say to our readers?
Athena: It is a lovely pantomime and it has a unique setting, but it’s a pantomime in the most traditional sense: teaching good moral lessons and there is comedy for children and adults alike.
Hades: I am not just a villain. I am the GOD of Villains – and I expect a good crowd of people ready to ‘BOOOOOO!’ me!
Le Rogue: I hope that you will come and see the greatest hero of less authority that the Kingdom of Pantomania has ever known. Also, I am a bit short on cash at the moment, so perhaps after the show, if you buy me a drink, I will make it worth your while. [Wink, wink]
Kendall: We have a hero, a damsel, a villain, a king, a thief, several Gods, three witches, three greasers, a mythological hag, a cafe worker, a singing contest, a sea dragon, and a kitchen sink. If that doesn’t say ‘family Christmas’, I don’t know what does.
Perseus, anything you’d like to add?
Perseus: Maths isn’t my strong suit…
Athena: To the interview about the pantomime, you idiot.
Perseus: Oh, you mean MY pantomime. IT IS EPIC!
WHO: The Phnom Penh Players
WHAT: The Epic Pantomime
WHERE: Russian Cultural Centre, corner of Norodom Blvd. and St. 222 (tickets available at The Willow Boutique Hotel, Divine Pizza & Ribs, and The Flicks)
WHEN: 7:30pm December 6 and 2pm and 7:30pm December 7
WHY: It’s EPIC!